Are You Too Sensitive Emotionally?
Earlier, in a blog post, we've discussed Emotional Intelligence (EI). Today, we will talk about exactly the opposite. And, that is Emotional Oversensitivity. You must be thinking, why it is important to discuss emotional sensitivity. Well, If EI is one of the crucial factors to influence your success, then we equally need to know about “oversensitivity” as it also has the potential to affect your life in a negative way.
What is Emotional Oversensitivity?
I, in reply, want to share some facts about “emotional sensitiveness”; what is it and what happens when someone is emotionally sensitive. Emotional sensitivity is all about emotions and the intensity of emotions a person experiences. A person is considered highly sensitive if he/she is really quick to detect and respond to the slightest change, signals or influences, than others. Emotionally sensitive individuals have faster reaction time to emotional situations, experience more intense reactions, and are slower to return to their emotional baseline. If you are emotionally sensitive, then you experience emotions more intensely than others. Your feelings of love, joy, happiness, anger, sorrow, or fear are stronger than average. As a result, you struggle every day to cope with it if you aren’t able to manage your feelings. Here I must inform you that, the opposite of sensitivity is not “being insensitive”, rather it’s “specificity” when the person is not having the above-mentioned condition.
What oversensitivity does to a person?
When a sensitive person comes into contact with a stimulus he/she is more likely to respond impulsively. Impulsive response means taking steps before considering adequate thinking. And, the person is more likely to take inappropriate decisions at that time due to lack of sufficient analyzation (since human brain requires some minimum reasoning time to process the given information). It, however, depends on our individual capabilities to think and complexity of the given situations (like how many and what kind of facts) it is processing. Here I should mention, we all have a certain potential to be oversensitive at some point when we feel vulnerable, including those who qualify with the term specificity. Not only weakness but sometimes our strong characteristic also triggers this sensitivity mode and manifests in some behavioral peculiarity that a person doesn't usually exhibit. however, oversensitivity often has terrible impacts on our self-esteem, life satisfaction, and decision-making capacity.
For emotionally sensitive people, just the thought of making a decision may create anxiety that interferes with thinking clearly. To cope with the unpleasantness, emotionally sensitive people often develop different styles of decision-making strategies that are not effective in generating optimal solutions. In addition to not making a “well-thought-out" planning, they often see themselves as unable to make good decisions, which only increases their anxiety and makes the problem worse.
Emotionally sensitive people often love the fact that they’re able to sense how others feel. They are passionate and compassionate. They experience intense joy. But at the same time, managing negative emotions such as sadness, anger, fear, envy, or jealousy can be a struggle. Being different from others in the intensity of their feelings can often lead them to form a negative view of themselves as well as towards the world, which creates additional issues such as hiding who they are, loneliness, or self-hatred.
Are you emotionally oversensitive?
If you are still in doubt, if you are one of them who are oversensitive emotionally, then here are some more clues that may guide you choosing the relevant conclusion. Some of the common symptoms people feel and sense of being emotionally sensitive are:
- Their general emotions are more extreme
- They're more self-aware than others
- They're detailed-oriented in analyzing the situation
- They become easily overwhelmed
- They react more quickly to certain situations
- Their pain tolerance is less
- They take criticism harshly
- They often reveal mistakes in the taken decisions
- They feel hurt easily
- They tend to take things personally
- They often experience tension or anxiety
- They are afraid of rejection, even in relatively minor situations
- They often have difficulty letting go of negative thoughts and emotions
- They often overreact to real or perceived slights and provocations
How to manage Oversensitivity:
This is a matter of fact that emotion is a necessary element of the human mind. It enables us to think and behave properly like a human. We all have a certain amount of emotions so that we can respond to life in a holistic way. Now the million dollar question is, if a person is overly sensitive, and facing the adverse effects of the emotional disposition, how he/she can manage it to utilize their sensitivity wisely and overcome its hurtful impacts, at the same time. Let me show you how to do this.
- let you feel what you feel:
Never overlook your feelings. If it is there, there must be a reason. So, the first thing first, just feel it. Is it good? Is it bad? Take your time and name it with a realistic perception. Such as, I am feeling sad; or mad, angry, good, excited, disappointed and so on. Now rate your feeling. It's all about the intensity of your experienced emotion; how good or bad it is. look at the scale below and rate your emotional magnitude, how strongly it hits you at. Note the number.
- Check your sensitivity level:
Once you are quite aware of your experienced emotion and its impacts on your mind using the self-rating system; its time to reveal how much oversensitivity is there. Think of the other people around you; your relatives, family members, co-workers, friends, or anyone you can think. How do you think, they could possibly respond emotionally in that exact situation you are going through? Rate how others would feel if it happened to them. Note the number using the scale above, what 80% of people would feel at that same incident you have faced. Check the difference and compare it with yours. This will show you how stronger you sense your feelings than most people in the world.
- Consider the consequences before response:
Though you enjoy life immensely because of your intense emotion, it many times allows you to take irrational actions, decisions, and responses that you could probably regret later. And, one of the main reasons behind that you often tend to skip thinking and jump into the action being emotionally impulsive. So, you need to practice mindful thinking to break the loop. The idea is simple; hold your impulses for a minute before giving any immediate response, especially whenever an emotional situation occurs. Don't react, rather choose your response considering the situational demands and the outcomes of your taken actions. Think of your choice panel of the probable responses and go for the best one after analyzing their consequences, to avoid the negative impact of your emotional reactions. In case, you have no such idea what to do, think of the possible responses that 80% of people (above mentioned) would opt in this exact scenario. This will allow you to make decisions rationally.
- Relaxation Booster:
Oversensitivity somehow is an overwhelming experience and many times it drains energy unwillingly as an emotional toll. As a result, it is quite common to experience stress, anxiety, fatigue, exhaustion or burn out frequently on a daily basis. However, the good news is, remedies are there. Mental and physical relaxation techniques often work remarkably as an antidote in this case. Just like a splash of water works great to put out a fire, a relaxed mind can prevent you from the long term effects of continuous exhaustion and emotional hangover.
Relax as much as possible. Allow yourself having extra time if you need. Enough sleep is necessary. You can try yoga or other breathing exercises. Deep breathing promotes more oxygen in your body and cools your mind almost instantly. Enjoying nature (visiting nearby park or garden) also works great to intact your perspectives. Socializing and spending quality time with the loved ones, can work on you remarkably.
If you find it difficult to get extra time to keep your cool, make it. Declutter your life. Manage your time only on what is important. Prioritizing tasks automatically provides you more time to relish your life. Stay happy. take care of yourself. Find a nice company whom you feel good with. Indulge in recreational activity. These are the ways you can counter the additional toxic build up in your mind and keeping yourself fresh at the same time.
- Seek help if required:
Though the above-mentioned steps are enough to keep your life and mind easy and mostly trouble free; don't hesitate to reach out to help if you find it difficult to manage things on your own. You can discuss the matter with the people you feel comfortable with. In case of severity, you can also contact the professionals who deal with the problems you are going through. Stay hopeful and solution-focused.
